G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)

• Year: 2009
• Released: 07 Aug 2009
• Country: United States
• Adwords: 3 wins & 16 nominations
• IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1046173/
• Rotten Tomatoes: https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/G_I_Joe_The_Rise_of_Cobra
• Available in: 720p, 1080p,
• Language: English, French, Gaelic
• MPA Rating: PG-13
• Genre: Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
• Runtime: 118 min
• Writer: Stuart Beattie, David Elliot, Paul Lovett
• Director: Stephen Sommers
• Cast: Dennis Quaid, Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans
• Keywords: murder, revenge, scientist, secret, hostage,

	5.7/10
	32/100

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra Storyline

Two soldiers stationed in Kazahkstan (Captain Duke Hauser and his partner “Ripcord”) are ordered to transport special warheads created by MARS, an arms’ manufacturer controlled by James McCullen. When they are attacked by thieves (led by Anastasia DeCobray, with whom Duke has history), they are saved by a top secret, international special forces unit known as “G.I. Joe”. The leader of G.I. Joe, General Abernathy (or Hawk) is on the trail of the thieves: an evil organization called “Cobra”. While Duke and Ripcord train to join the Joes, McCullen (“Destro”) is secretly working for Cobra and plotting to recapture his metal-eating “Nanomite” warheads. Duke and Ripcord (with help from Heavy Duty, Snake Eyes, and the rest of the Joes) must prove that they are Real American Heroes — by stopping the launch of these warheads before Cobra uses them to take over the world.

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G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra Movie Reviews

Far from a masterpiece, but I enjoyed it for what it was

GI Joe:Rise of Cobra was better than expected, at least in my view. It is far from a masterpiece, the story is often thin and unfocused, Channing Tatum is bland and painful to watch sometimes and the quality of the script is uneven, there are some smart and witty lines but there are also some really bad howlers as well. That said, I did enjoy it for what it was, and I have seen far worse movies, some of which didn’t promise much(Disaster Movie) and some of which did look as though it would be entertaining but it was actually a pile of rubbish(Dungeons & Dragons). The sets, scenery, costumes, cinematography and special effects are wonderful to watch, the music is memorable and suitably bombastic, the action is thrilling, the film is decently paced, the finale is the epitome of the term epic and Dennis Quaid is quite good in his role. Overall, far from perfect but for me not a pile of buffalo dung either. 7/10 Bethany Cox

Action Figures Sold Separately

I’m too old to have played with GI Joes as a child, but I do recall my nephew did so love his action figures as a child. As the credits rolled at the beginning of the film I saw that Hasbro Toys was acknowledged as the creator of GI Joe which was only proper. With the film based on a doll, the creators really had a free hand in making up out of whole cloth a story for the ever combat prepared action figure whom Channing Tatum brings to life.

Poor Tatum should have gotten something better for his troubles. He’s a soldier who joins an elite unit after a convoy he’s assigned to is attacked. The unit is an international fighting force headed by Dennis Quaid who twenty years earlier might have been cast in Tatum’s role.

The mission of this unit is a serious one. Some meglomaniacal arms dealer is looking to start World War III and he’s got a real nasty weapon to do the job. A missile warhead with thousands of Nano-bots who eat metal until the off switch is turned. Drop them on a crowded city and the structures will be a feeding ground.

Some ten years earlier in Agent Cody Banks a similar type weapon was what teenage agent Frankie Muniz was fighting. I enjoyed that film better than this.

And the seeds of the sequel were planted in this film, a sequel coming out later this year. I’ll try and restrain myself.

Silly, convoluted kid-friendly product

A disappointingly routine action blockbuster, based like TRANSFORMERS on a line of toys and offering up exactly the same kind of big-bucks-equals-missing-storyline kind of nonsense. I keep watching these movies with the intention to enjoy them, but they’re so shallowly plotted – and the characters are so thin – that even printed cartoons have more depth. The nonsensical back story to this film involves some super-weapon that the bad guys use to plan destruction while the good guys have to stop them.

The cast is terrible, particularly the walking slab of meat that is Channing Tatum. It says something when the best performance comes from Ray Park (Darth Maul in STAR WARS EPISODE I: THE PHANTOM MENACE), an actor who remains suited and masked for the entire duration of the movie. Way too much time is given over to physically handsome but bland and untalented personalities like Sienna Miller, Rachel Nichols and the aforementioned Tatum while genuine actors like Jonathan Pryce and Dennis Quaid are left on the sidelines. Of the younger stars, Joseph Gordon-Levitt is miscast in a role that needs a much older and more experienced actor while Lee Byung-hun (A BITTERSWEET LIFE) gets to show off some fancy martial arts and that’s about it. The less said about Christopher Eccleston’s OTT turn as the bad guy, the better.

The one good thing about G. I. JOE is the quality of the special effects work, which is truly excellent (a lengthy and destructive car chase is the highlight in this respect). Every dollar of the mega budget is up on the screen for all to see. Unfortunately, though, director Stephen Sommers shows no respect for cinematic convention such as story development, suspense or character arcs, preferring instead to begin with a massively elaborate action scene and virtually keep it up for the entire running time. The resultant overkill unfortunately saps the film of most of its enjoyment.